Soldier's Wives, ' Til Death Do Us..

[JPK Huson 1863]

Bumping into a few articles on soldiers' wives made me thoughtful. How many photos do we have of soldiers taken with their wives next to them- you can guess in most cases the uniform creating an unspoken gulf of terror between them. I mean think about it. Long years grumbling and growling between states had finally peaked- instead of ebb water a violent tidal wave threatened to sweep families apart, out to the war, out to death.

I don't think we can fool ourselves what any of these photos were. And are. Reminders of one's love while away- at any moment cherished relic of a lost husband. They knew it too, some faces unable to avoid a searching camera.

Then what of the wives? Pensions took time and that's if the widow could file papers herself, that dependent on whether she could get papers or knew what to do. It's been appalling finding information like ar Bull Run especially someone held a war and someone forgot to bring the bandaids. They also held a war, asked men to possibly die for their country but no one thought to check in and see what in blaze was occurring to the folks who were dependent on the fallen.

Chances are some of these men did not come home. The lives of their families were about to change.

She looks upset- as well she might. You can see so, so much in her face, poor dear thing.

They both seem pensive here, one seems weighed down by the gravity of the situation, she looks almost bewildered.

 

[JPK Huson 1863]

Pinterest, ebay and LoC

 

[JPK Huson 1863]

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Pinterest, Ebay and LoC

 

[donna]

Annie these are wonderful photos. Thanks so much for posting.

They are special since yesterday was "Our Wedding Anniversary".

 

[18thVirginia]

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Pinterest, Ebay and LoC

Great photos, JPK.

 

[LoyaltyOfDogs]

Thanks, JPK, for these wonderful portraits. Several are unusually sentimental poses from a time when many -- if not most -- portraits were stiffly formal poses of subjects wearing solemn expressions. I especially like the ones of the soldier watching as his wife reads his letter, the woman in the ruffled gown, with her husband gazing at her as she looks upward (to Heaven?) and the soldier clasping his wife in his arms. This last one is so spontaneous that it looks like a modern casual portrait, as if the couple could be any of our friends or neighbors today. They all make me wish we could know more about the people pictured.

 

[nitrofd]

Those are truly a great selection of photos, but everyone looks like they are attending a funeral.

 

[Anna Elizabeth Henry]

Such beautiful photos, as always! Loved the one where the lady is sitting in her husband's lap. Reminds me of a modern wedding shot almost.

The accompanying newspaper clippings are enough to make your blood boil though. These women were left behind while their husbands fought for their country and didn't have the means to maintain the home monetarily. It had to be humiliating for them to be deemed a common pauper when it wasn't their doing.

I had read an account of some women who lived in the Five Points area in downtown Manhattan whose husbands left them to join regiments very early in the war. Most were Irish immigrants and felt it was an excellent opportunity for them to earn money as many were turned away from better paying jobs just for being Irish. The poor wives found themselves destitute as the men weren't getting paid in the early months which proved detrimental to most as their jobs as seamstresses and laundry ladies weren't enough for rent let alone food, too. Sadly many turned to prostitution or ended up in the poor house, starving.

Its a forgotten tragedy what many of these women suffered. Sleepless nights worrying about your husband dying is horrible enough, but to end up destitute with little ones to feed and no where to turn has to be a mother's worst nightmare. So many things were overlooked or ignored at the beginning of the war like no medical supplies, no organization of a hospital system or even basic things like sanitation and hygiene. And of course our poor ladies were completely neglected and a mere afterthought.

 

[Cumpston1862]

Something that should be mentioned about these pictures is that for many of the wives their last remembrance of their husband could well be this image or a last letter from the front. If their husband died and they applied for a pension the wife than had to prove they were in fact married to the soldier. One of the only things a widow could sometimes send as proof was a picture of their husband or a picture such as the ones above that they were married. Sometimes last letters were sent. How unfortunate that a widow and family would have to give up the last link they had to their father or husband. The pension bureau would not return these items either. They were kept in the file and many remain there to this day. A tragedy for the family but a rare gem for the descendants doing research.

 

[JPK Huson 1863]

Something that should be mentioned about these pictures is that for many of the wives their last remembrance of their husband could well be this image or a last letter from the front. If their husband died and they applied for a pension the wife than had to prove they were in fact married to the soldier. One of the only things a widow could sometimes send as proof was a picture of their husband or a picture such as the ones above that they were married. Sometimes last letters were sent. How unfortunate that a widow and family would have to give up the last link they had to their father or husband. The pension bureau would not return these items either. They were kept in the file and many remain there to this day. A tragedy for the family but a rare gem for the descendants doing research.

Did not know the photos were not returned!! I knew the photo were frequently made as a - hopefully unspoken- treasure in case he did not return. Can you imagine? Bet an awful lot of soldiers photo we have today are thanks to that. Horrible- having to trade your last photo, maybe your only photo of you together for money to eat? Thanks for this Cumpston. You really do ( you meaning me ) learn something new daily here.

 

[JPK Huson 1863]

Such beautiful photos, as always! Loved the one where the lady is sitting in her husband's lap. Reminds me of a modern wedding shot almost.

The accompanying newspaper clippings are enough to make your blood boil though. These women were left behind while their husbands fought for their country and didn't have the means to maintain the home monetarily. It had to be humiliating for them to be deemed a common pauper when it wasn't their doing.

I had read an account of some women who lived in the Five Points area in downtown Manhattan whose husbands left them to join regiments very early in the war. Most were Irish immigrants and felt it was an excellent opportunity for them to earn money as many were turned away from better paying jobs just for being Irish. The poor wives found themselves destitute as the men weren't getting paid in the early months which proved detrimental to most as their jobs as seamstresses and laundry ladies weren't enough for rent let alone food, too. Sadly many turned to prostitution or ended up in the poor house, starving.

Its a forgotten tragedy what many of these women suffered. Sleepless nights worrying about your husband dying is horrible enough, but to end up destitute with little ones to feed and no where to turn has to be a mother's worst nightmare. So many things were overlooked or ignored at the beginning of the war like no medical supplies, no organization of a hospital system or even basic things like sanitation and hygiene. And of course our poor ladies were completely neglected and a mere afterthought.

What a horrific account of the wives in juxtaposition of their husbands' sacrifices on the field! HOLY Gee Whiz, Anna! We are lucky enough to have thread after thread on how despicably Irish were treated societally thanks to Pat Young ( have you been here long enough to catch up with his work? Our very own immigration attorney, somehow has time here, too- gives us deep History on immigrant H**l in the US, esp our Irish ). Also our unbelievable Irish brigades.

So there we are as a country- benefitting from and lauding OKane and the Irish, their families faring no better than destitute at home. Same could be said for black troops and worse- those faamilies were sometimes destitute the second their soldier walked through military gates- and we were supposed to be the ' good guys '!

I seriously do not mean to pick holes in silver linings or destroy lovely images- honest. It's like this thing with plantation homes 150 year later. Image. These photos, lovely couples obviously so close,a fledgling family- then what? The other half of a soldier, what happens to her if her husband dies? What is behind the photo on the surface so lovely? Those homes, so lovely, who built them, what occurred in those walls, what was the entire premise of their existence? It's the image-what else is there, you know? Little off topic, I couldn't hold a wedding at one of those venues, give me the willies.

With these images, perhaps what is behind them makes them even more dear to us. It's a little like eaves dropping on a marriage's bedroom conversation, viewing them correctly- so private, life and death and this moment in Time for 2 people loving each other deeply. Saying goodbye, perhaps with awful finality.

 

[JPK Huson 1863]

Thanks, JPK, for these wonderful portraits. Several are unusually sentimental poses from a time when many -- if not most -- portraits were stiffly formal poses of subjects wearing solemn expressions. I especially like the ones of the soldier watching as his wife reads his letter, the woman in the ruffled gown, with her husband gazing at her as she looks upward (to Heaven?) and the soldier clasping his wife in his arms. This last one is so spontaneous that it looks like a modern casual portrait, as if the couple could be any of our friends or neighbors today. They all make me wish we could know more about the people pictured.

I know, right? Most make me think of my kids generations- the expressions, the energy- everything. Age range unbelievably 35-16 ( moral of that story do not allow your daughters to go school in Europe. Men there have foreign accents. ). I see them in the one you like, she is on his lap, just fun, informal- OH my, I hope he came home! I see it in the dainty little wife, sitting, bow on her head and the mustached husband looking as if life must have been terribly light hearted for them until- this.

Maybe the photo which kills me the most is the last- something about her. Like she is expecting to absorb a harsh, hard blow, is already living in momentary expectation. Poor, dear thing.

 

[zburkett]

Great post, great thread. Reminds us of just how total the war really was.

 

[Anna Elizabeth Henry]

What a horrific account of the wives in juxtaposition of their husbands' sacrifices on the field! HOLY Gee Whiz, Anna! We are lucky enough to have thread after thread on how despicably Irish were treated societally thanks to Pat Young ( have you been here long enough to catch up with his work? Our very own immigration attorney, somehow has time here, too- gives us deep History on immigrant H**l in the US, esp our Irish ). Also our unbelievable Irish brigades.

So there we are as a country- benefitting from and lauding OKane and the Irish, their families faring no better than destitute at home. Same could be said for black troops and worse- those faamilies were sometimes destitute the second their soldier walked through military gates- and we were supposed to be the ' good guys '!

I seriously do not mean to pick holes in silver linings or destroy lovely images- honest. It's like this thing with plantation homes 150 year later. Image. These photos, lovely couples obviously so close,a fledgling family- then what? The other half of a soldier, what happens to her if her husband dies? What is behind the photo on the surface so lovely? Those homes, so lovely, who built them, what occurred in those walls, what was the entire premise of their existence? It's the image-what else is there, you know? Little off topic, I couldn't hold a wedding at one of those venues, give me the willies.

With these images, perhaps what is behind them makes them even more dear to us. It's a little like eaves dropping on a marriage's bedroom conversation, viewing them correctly- so private, life and death and this moment in Time for 2 people loving each other deeply. Saying goodbye, perhaps with awful finality.

JPK I've managed to read some of Pat Young's work about the Irish and other immigrants and their unfortunate experiences. Haven't caught up on it all though. Five Points especially was a horrible place and mainly housed immigrants. Think 'Gangs of New York' and that's the conditions and misery some of these women lived in while their husbands were gone. I can't even fathom the hardships faced by black troops and their families back home. Imagine what obstacles they were met with when trying to obtain death pensions?

I agree the photos freeze in time a bittersweet moment, so much hardship, pain and sadness surely brewed right under the surface of these images. Even when the men came back were they able to work? Countless soldiers were amputees - what were their options for work when most every job required physical labor? Where did that leave the women? Did they try to fill the monetary void while raising children? I'm unfamiliar with the assistance available at the time from the government, but I doubt it provided any compensation for disability benefits for these men.

People always see these photos in a whimsical light and think oh wow, life was simpler back then and its so easy to feel that way, but when you peel back the layers to what lurks beneath the puffed out crinoline dresses, top hats, and gleaming swords you realize it was far more complicated and it wasn't all balls, afternoon tea and rolling bandages for the ladies.

 

[JPK Huson 1863]

LoC gives up more treasures daily. Sometimes a photograph will be entered twice; only once will the identifier be attached. If I come across identifiers for any of these, they'll be edited.

In my head, all these men came home.

I haven't come across this couple on Pinterest- perhaps new in LoC?

Isn't this a wonderful couple, just immersed in the Deepest South somewhere. Was this hers, kept at home or his, taken to war?

Wive's faces tend to be enigmatic- this war surreal, their husbands terribly threatened, they seem sometimes expressionless. You can guess the fear behind these portraits.

She may be blind, I cannot tell. Her eyes seem more than merely nearly closed by way of expression. There's a photo of my grgrgrandfather, blind for the last 15 years of his life, which looks like this.

These three wives, wearing rings and holding ' something ' appear to have been either being honored or were honoring husbands. It is tough to see but a small doll surrounded by flowers is clutched in her hand, seen in close up. It's baffling, yes but some kind of odd photo in memory husbands hopefully just away at way. Hoping they were not lost. If so, what a unique mourning photograph.

 

[18thVirginia]

I wonder if many of these were wedding photos. Have read in women's diaries of their friends, relatives getting married when the man was off to war or briefly at home.

That my parents were married after they met during WWII and this old veteran who lived with us married someone he'd met 3 weeks before getting married as he was getting ready to go overseas, I guess makes me think of couples getting married and having photos taken.

 

[FarawayFriend]

Great photos, great thread again!
Although I cannot really agree to this:

you can guess in most cases the uniform creating an unspoken gulf of terror between them.

I think every man looks terrific in uniform (right, @LoriAnn ?).
So, being a generation of men and women unfortunately forced to being accustomed to war more than we are, the women sure were also very proud of their dashing partners. Of course, the thought "will I see him again once he has left me?" must have overshadowed the photo session. But I would not call that "a gulf of terror" - I think they were torn between pride and worries...

 

[Pvt.Shattuck]

I am struck by how little men's appearance has changed and how dramatically different modern women's fashion has become. From the gracious lady's hoop burka to Madonna, Miley Cyrus and Kim Kardashian. What would our decorous, virtuous, modest Civil War women think of them?

 

[LoriAnn]

I think every man looks terrific in uniform (right, @LoriAnn ?).

Ooooh yeaaaah.

 

[JPK Huson 1863]

I am struck by how little men's appearance has changed and how dramatically different modern women's fashion has become. From the gracious lady's hoop burka to Madonna, Miley Cyrus and Kim Kardashian. What would our decorous, virtuous, modest Civil War women think of them?

Whoa, that is crazy! Never occurred to me! You're absolutely right! You could put a wife wearing clothing from so many, many generations next to these men and not blink.