Women and War

Do you know, I still see this as men trying to protect others from the horrors of war. I'm sure there was a desire not to relive the horrors, but that need to protect seems to ring out loud and clear also. They did not want others to experience, even in an imaginary way, what they had experienced themselves.
Horrific as it is for us to think about now, right as the vets were coming home to the US after WW2, there were articles instructing family members to not talk about what the men went through! At the time, they thought (oh so wrongly) that avoidance of reminders was the best way to help men heal, so there's a lot of truth to what you're saying - protection of the women protecting the men protecting the women.
 
If there was ever an image that captures shell shock, it's this one from World War I:

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My heart breaks at seeing this. What was this person like before seeing what he saw? What was his life like after? Did his loved ones even know him any longer? Questions like these are so important in helping someone heal, and after the Civil War, they certainly didn't think to ask them of anyone, much less women on the home front.
 

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If there was ever an image that captures shell shock, it's this one from World War I:

soldado-louco.jpg


My heart breaks at seeing this. What was this person like before seeing what he saw? What was his life like after? Did his loved ones even know him any longer? Questions like these are so important in helping someone heal, and after the Civil War, they certainly didn't think to ask them of anyone, much less women on the home front.
That is an extremely heartbreaking picture. When I was college, I sat through my fair share of depressing history classes, but the thing that I found the most upsetting was footage of WWI shell shock victims. They all had 1000 yard stares and involuntary twitches. That was several years ago, and I still find myself thinking about those men and what became of them on a fairly regular basis. :frown:

I'm actually wondering if PTSD might re-enter the national conversation a little more lately than it has. To me, it seems like since media coverage of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan has tapered off, there is less general discussion of PTSD. But I have seen a fair amount of coverage this week about a debut novel from a writer who is an Iraqi War vet. He was a combat medic who returned with severe PTSD and, in an effort to cope, turned to heroin and then bank robbery. He wrote his highly autobiographical novel from prison, where he is still currently incarcerated. Seems like his book is getting a lot of early critical acclaim. I found this profile of him (written long before his book came out) and it seems to touch on a lot of what we've been discussing in this thread. (Just FYI: some of the content is graphic and disturbing.)
 

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I will have to come back to this thread and read it more thoroughly, but I saw the discussion of PTSD pop up.

I'm actually wondering if PTSD might re-enter the national conversation a little more lately than it has.
I hope it does. For the first time this past July, I noticed people talking about PTSD and 4th of July fireworks (something I hadn't even considered, but it makes sense), and how we should be aware of those around us who might not find the late night neighborhood firework show amusing.

I was glad to see it being discussed. I was also introduced not that long ago to the term "Moral Injury", and that really left an impression on me. It's something I think about now with every new veteran I meet.

Finally, I'm also seeing more charities dedicated to healing our veterans, mentally and emotionally as well as physically. With the conversation continuing, and more and more posts popping up on social media (which is powerful), I think we're heading in the right direction.
 
I hope it does. For the first time this past July, I noticed people talking about PTSD and 4th of July fireworks (something I hadn't even considered, but it makes sense), and how we should be aware of those around us who might not find the late night neighborhood firework show amusing.

I was glad to see it being discussed. I was also introduced not that long ago to the term "Moral Injury", and that really left an impression on me. It's something I think about now with every new veteran I meet.

Finally, I'm also seeing more charities dedicated to healing our veterans, mentally and emotionally as well as physically. With the conversation continuing, and more and more posts popping up on social media (which is powerful), I think we're heading in the right direction.
Yes, I hope so! I've also noticed those notes about the 4th of July and fireworks pop up in more recent years.
 
I'm not amused by the unsanctioned Fourth of July fireworks shows my neighbors put on. :cautious:

Or as my dog probably calls it "Terrible Boom Boom Nightmare Day." I feel so bad for him, he just cowers in the bathroom, and all control of bodily functions goes out the window. I almost cry, poor thing. :cry:

Neither of my grandfathers, both veterans, ever mentioned anything about fireworks or showed signs of PTSD when I was around, thank goodness.
 
I suspect that some of the tapering off of discussion about PTSD is due to our continued dissonance about the issue (how to be strong militarily if your soldiers are actually human??) as well as admitting we've provided substandard care for traumatized vets. We have a lot to own up to.
Sadly, I suspect you're right. I went to a college where appreciation for veterans was stressed, but it always bewildered me the form that it was expressed in--very much in surface-level displays. Not that there's anything inherently wrong with that (pretty much everybody in my family is a veteran, including both parents, my stepmother, both grandfathers, and numerous uncles and cousins, so I'm all for letting vets know they're appreciated), but there seemed to be an almost willful refusal to address more serious issues.

I distinctly remember some club meeting where we were talking for the millionth time about decorating military graves and I piped up and wondered if maybe brainstorming some project for people on deployments/their families and/or veterans struggling with homelessness/mental health issues was not a better use of our time. There was a really long, awkward pause, and then they just kept talking like I never said anything. :banghead:
 
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I'm not amused by the unsanctioned Fourth of July fireworks shows my neighbors put on. :cautious:

Or as my dog probably calls it "Terrible Boom Boom Nightmare Day." I feel so bad for him, he just cowers in the bathroom, and all control of bodily functions goes out the window. I almost cry, poor thing. :cry:
Poor doggie! My dog is a Chihuahua; therefore, he is a narcissist. :bounce:

He will somehow not notice any of the firework noise that terrifies all the other animals. But then he'll suddenly detect it, momentarily be frightened, and then get so angry that someone is interrupting his evening. And then he forgets about it and goes back to what he's doing until he notices it again a couple of hours later. :roflmao:
 
I'm so glad the issue of PTSD is getting an airing on this thread because men and women of course are both affected in the circumstances. Thank you all for sharing your stories.

A lot of understanding needs to happen with regard to how we confront the realities of war, and how men and women in many ways 'do war' differently, which is especially true during the time of the CW with men being the main combatants and women mainly staying at home to support families. I'm quite sure they kept many things from one another in order to try and hold eachother up and ease one another's anxieties. This would in turn have affected perspectives on war.

For women to have applied the 'white feather' treatment tells me that women did not fully understand the impact of the horrors of war. For men suffering from PTSD, the need to 'hide' their suffering tells me men were determined to remain 'strong', inadvertently keeping women from understanding. It's interesting, as @7th Mississippi Infantry shared, that talking to other vets allowed men to freely share their experiences and feelings about war. At the same time women were 'out of the loop'. Without the ability to acknowledge or understand the impact, an important conversation was never had.

I'm glad we are able to have that conversation today.
 
So, another question has now been posed in my mind ... were women so willing to send men off to war because they weren't aware themselves of the full horrors of it? And in the aftermath men continued to protect them from that?

In the case of the Civil War I'd say the men probably didn't speak about the horrors to their families. My great grandfather, who told stories to my dad when he was growing up knew Civil War veterans when he was younger and the stories he related were always very general, no graphic details and the occasional funny story. Then again, maybe the veterans censored it for their audience - children who wanted to hear war tales.

The letters home I've read generally don't make mention of the horrible realities of war. But then again, perhaps you don't want to be too honest to make your wife and family worry anymore than they already are worrying!
 
In the case of the Civil War I'd say the men probably didn't speak about the horrors to their families. My great grandfather, who told stories to my dad when he was growing up knew Civil War veterans when he was younger and the stories he related were always very general, no graphic details and the occasional funny story. Then again, maybe the veterans censored it for their audience - children who wanted to hear war tales.

The letters home I've read generally don't make mention of the horrible realities of war. But then again, perhaps you don't want to be too honest to make your wife and family worry anymore than they already are worrying!
Very true. I've read several soldiers' letters that state they either cannot or will not describe some of the things they saw and did during battle. Most of us have probably read the quote from an officer at Spotsylvania who basically said he didn't expect to be believed when he spoke about it, because he would have a hard time believing it if he hadn't been there. There was a chilling letter I found - and unfortunately can't find now - where a soldier pretty much begged his family not to ask him details and ended with something like "I will not tell of it".
 
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