"What’s the use of being a soldier unless you’re a merry one?"

John Hartwell

Lt. Colonel
Forum Host
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Aug 27, 2011
Location
Central Massachusetts
The fine art of shirking:
[The following are selected entries from the diary of Luther Fairbank, 31st Mass. Volunteers. All are from the year 1863. It begins while he is stationed at Fort Jackson, Louisiana.]

Jan 63: Sat. 17 Worked pulling timber out of the moat, — or I did my part, — I held up the end of the rope. No danger of my hurting myself at work.

Fri 30: At retreat the Gen. Officer of the Day, Col. Bryan of 175th N.Y. gave us fits because the G’ds were absent and we had 29 prisoners in the G’d House —

Feb: Wed. 4 This a.m. Holcher and I left Parmenter on g’d at the barn, and went about a mile to a saloon and had some beer and got back just as the relief came, which was about 4 p.m.

Fri. 6 Serg. Canterbury said if I would put up a tent he would excuse me from drill, and I jumped at the chance, for I put up the tent in ½ hour, and had the rest of the day to myself. I went out and had my picture taken —

April Fri. 3 This a.m. I was detailed for G’d, Capt. Allen gave me thunder for having the paste board out of my cap, just as tho’ a soldier is to carry everything he may happen to want, but I am one of the lazy sort, bound to make soldiering as easy as possible.

Saty. 4 Came off G’d at 8 a.m. and cleaned up for Inspection. Then lay down for a snooze. It beats all how sleepy this G’d work does make a man. I had a good dinner that Lashua (the Butcher) stole at the depot and gave me half for cooking. I was asleep at Dress Parade time and came near getting caught.

[There is less opportunity ... and more risk ... in "laying back" during campaign season, during which time he participated in the siege of Port Hudson.]

Sept. Fri. 4 Our Regiment on Picket. I never got posted till 2 o’cl’k, — then in front of a negro house, and we had good quarters. The yellow and mulatto girls made good company most of the night.

Thurs. 17 Worked pulling weeds in the A.M. for Review ground, and went to work in P.M., but ran off 15 or 20 times to camp.

Oct Mon. 12 I didn’t drill but half the day, being detailed to make an easy chair for Walter Gardner, but the Capt. got him one down town, so I laid still.

Sun. 25 Co. Inspectn this A.M. After Roll Call Geo. Fisher, Lem Williams and I went off and stayed till 12 o’cl’k and had a good time.

Wed. 28 I am on Picket, on the Reserve, and we have had a bully time. Men and women would have the countersign, which is a bottle of whiskey, but sweet potatoes, eggs, &c., went the best with me. No matter how strong secesh, they all pay tribute to the Pickets, and one guard had to go to the Provost Marshall’s office with each team to let the folks take the oath. I had the luck to ride up in a hack with 2 handsome ladies, who told about some soldiers stealing their geese. I was the very chap.

[During the winter of 1963-4, the 31st was mounted, and thereafter served as Cavalry]

Dec, Sun. 20 Today I was detailed to go to N.O. after horses, and when they were getting them out I skedaddled and went onto Thalia St. and stayed some time, and came back to camp in the horse cars. Thus far there has been nothing said to me about it. This evening I went up to town and have just got back, at 11 p.m. Small loss about Roll Call. Punish me if they wish! I have had the fun and all the punishment they can do won’t help the matter in the least, — only make me go so much the oftener. What’s the use of being a soldier unless you’re a merry one!

Mon. 21 The same old story of lying around camp, — only new horses are prancing around and the boys get dismounted at short notice, and the horses put[?] for the stable’ Corp. Young and myself took a short walk from the camp and were not at Retreat Roll Call, and therefore were reported absent; and when we returned we had to report to the Capt. We made a good excuse, but must put a stop to this being absent from Roll Call. Maybe I shall when nothing else occupies my time.

Tues. 22 A few more horses came today, but I have none as yet, nor am I in any hurry just yet, for I have none to take care of. So what’s the use of a horse when you can get rid of it? When the Capt. gives me one, I shall be obliged to take it, but I won’t ask for it.

Thurs. 24 On G’d for the first time with a sabre. It’s a little easier than carrying a musket.

Thurs. 31 Today brings 1863 to a close, and I am on G’d, — and, oh! what a cold day! It rained some in the a.m., but before I went on it stopped and the wind blew up clear and cold. The boys left for the Regular Battery in the a.m., Smith going instead of Casey, who is sick. We were mustered, — it being the last of the month. We built bunks in our tent. I was on post at the time, but being so near I could jump out if any Officer came around, but I am going to bed and if nothing happens my work is finished for 1863


[Private Fairbank's diary of a remarkably frank one. He speaks often of his shirking, and openly ridicules some of his officers, clearly resenting all their privileges. He also refers to the entertainment he enjoys among the local ladies, black and white. A transcript of the complete diaries (1862-65) can be found HERE.]
 
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It all sounds so exhausting, doesn't it? My husband told me of job, during summers in college, where he showed up raring to go- you know kids. He said the older, regular workers had a huge fit over that kind of irregular behavior. One spent one's work day migrating through a series of hidey-holes, avoiding work and the foreman. He's as ants-in-the-pants as I am ( you see the attraction ), drove him crazy- bored? He was more exhausted by day's end than if they allowed him to go do something.
 
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