We Were At This Awhile, Mourning, Watered-Down By 1861

JPK Huson 1863

Brev. Brig. Gen'l
Joined
Feb 14, 2012
Location
Central Pennsylvania
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Admittedly, a lower income citizen of Brussels in the era would have passed into Eternity with less fanfare. Point of the thread is, as elaborate as mourning was, in the 1860's, it had settled down quite a bit. Women still bore the lion's share of the dye pot but gone were expectations that Death could only be sailed into, like Charles V of Brussels in 1558, on a life sized ship float at the head of his funeral procession.

Practices varied. In Egypt, during an early era, for a relative's death you shaved your eye brows. A beloved pet? You'd have all your hair plucked out. By those standards, we barely blink and the war era practices seem tame. By the war, coffins were at a premium post battle. Men were wrapped in blankets, if any could found and buried quickly. If at all. Mourning? If women could. They tired. There was just so much, please no one be fooled this strict mourning process was always possible. They sure grieved.

Or Paris, coffins were propped in one's doorway- deceased inside. That isn't around any more and wasn't, 150 years ago. Flowers came into use because bodies were kept in the front room for quite awhile, not to pretty-up a funeral.

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We owe Matilda of Flanders her work on the famous tapestry, for a look at Edward's funeral. No record of what Matilda wore, at least I cannot find it.

In past centuries, centuries before the war, one's ' winding sheets ', what you were buried in, would be included in your wedding presents. Yep. Toasters, salad spinners and your winding sheets. Even paupers received their procession through the streets before a brief ceremony and a parish burial. Funerals for the well heeled? Lasted a week.

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Pretty clearly a widow, probably an intentional sitting wearing widow's weeds and mourning cameo. Possibly ( cannot swear to it ) an early war widow. Her hair is late 1850's-early 1860's, clothing has begun the be-ribboned, ultra feminine, era trend.

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It's the single hold-over- drench-in-black, head-to toe women. This is an early 1500's widow, clothing style changes through centuries, rituals she was expected to go through softened- like not expecting wives to hurl themselves onto a husband's funeral pyre - but 1861 still saw them draped in colors of mourning.

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Lot of talk on ' Momento Mori ', one, more hold over. Mary, Queen of Scots owned this. Exhibited in 1889 at the Stuart Exhibition no idea where it lives now. The fact that Queen Mary owned it during her life time questions the meaning. Remembering death is where we are all headed seems the most likely, not a momento remembering someone who has already died. Generations pre-war seemed to have been far more preoccupied with death than were our era ancestors.



One heart rending description by a Southern woman, of her small town during the war includes the stench of dye pots, boiling. Women, dying dresses black. Men had it a little easier. Clothing tended to be dark. A black arm band sufficed, or hat band and waistcoat. Women were expected to drench themselves in black, drape homes and children and self in trappings of woe you just could not get away from. Dreary grays trimmed with black, black black black.We have threads on the topic, elaborate mourning rituals observed by bereaved during this mid-Victorian period.

But were they? Elaborate, I mean. Just as we view mourning expectations of the war years from our vantage point- ours has diminished to the point where black appears just during a funeral ( and we're now seeing jeans at that event ), what our ancestors of the war years observed was pretty pitiful compared to their grgrgrandparents. Those slackers. And theirs. More slackers.

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" Poor women in the number of 266 ", amongst those following Queen Elizabeth's body, in 1603. No idea what the meaning of this might be. Later, women were disallowed during funerals, later still, the practice we still follow today of long processions leading to cemeteries became ' normal '. Without 266 poor women. Funeral homes charge extra for poor women and the Archbishop of Canterbury.

It's a little worrying. We've reached the point currently where once someone has been buried, two weeks later the topic receives " What? Are you still on that ? " Our grgrgrandparents would still be tip toing into the room, offering tea and toast to the bereaved. Their grgrgrandparents might still be holding a wake. Disclaimer here is, so many different cultures in our country practiced so many different rites of passages it is impossible, covering all of them.

https://civilwartalk.com/threads/our-ancestors-mourning-rituals.114870/#post-1143433
Have several ' mourning ' threads, hate to repeat too much.

From Roman days, one HUGE common these has been women especially wearing black. A Roman governor did decree the period be limited to 10 and no children under 3 be included. You just know things muct have been getting out of hand.

Here's one we dispensed with. I'm not sure, as a matter of staking claim on the importance of each life, we should not bring it back.
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Your loved one's name was called by a public mourner, saying Brothers and Sisters must witness the passing of this soul, on this day. Words varied- and for Royalty, it went on for awhile but a death was announced in a public, solemn pronouncement. For all to hear. These examples were 17th century. We know it had vanished by our war.

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Some photos gift us with the story. A war widow in mourning, she holds her dead, soldier husband's carefully framed image. Her dress is not black although you can bet sewed those black buttons onto the darkest fabric she had. Her husband's photo is too vague to see whether he is Union or Confederate- my money's on Confederate. Why? She did not buy a new dress and her hair ornament, for some reason, we see more in the South. Could be wrong. We have so many photos of widows it's possible this was an era ' ritual ' recognizing death and her new status.

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Chose this, an era, royal death in Germany as how it had changed, even for an Emperor. It's huge, but does not make you gasp, as with an entire war ship float or week long funeral or procession 3 miles long or dragging skulls around to remind you of That Day or.....


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Saxon means the time frame, ancient history, 9th century, Saxon widow, cloth and fur, described in book ' A History of Mourning "

We've been at this awhile. As crazy as some observances may have seemed, during the war, we'd sure toned it down from centuries past.

From Hathitrust, LoC, NYPL

 
Great thread and wonderful pictures. I even read the tiny print on the engravings. I really, really, appreciate all the hard work you do in putting together these threads! I love them and learn so much. However, I'll take the salad spinner over the winding sheets.
 
Hate to be dreary, we just lost so many, many men from 1861 to 1865. Over 600,000 and we're still arguing the point. For each, someone mourned. For an awful lot of them, there was no funeral, just a hasty burial on a battlefield or hospital or along the way, marching somewhere. Or lost at sea. Families sometimes never knew what became of their loved one- they simply never came home.

North and South, this mourning process we seem to have perfected through centuries became a way of life. Is this where it all changed, tradition marking someone's death shed as it became clear one life was, after all, not as dear as we thought?
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