I went looking for those lyrics to Jeff Davis' Dream, and found this passage is "The Common Soldier in the Civil War:"
In the correspondence of an Ohio Yank was found a poem, “Jeff
Davis’ Dream,” which for gross obscenity would stand high in erotic
literature of any period. But no information was given concerning the
source or circulation of this item.
But, no lyrics
According to Dr Lowry, there were two versions: One written in 1863 by Bernard Covert described the Confederate president trembling at the thought of a Yankee noose around his neck, and criticised England and France for aiding the rebels. All the themes are political.
Utterly different is the second version, which appears in numerous hand-written editions - this will be the version that 'The Common soldier in the Civil War' was alluding to.
Not sure if I can get away with posting this on here, but I'll give it a go. No worse than any Rugby song, but I warn you, Shakespeare it ain't
One night as Jeff lay fast asleep
With his wife huged to his heart.
A little closer she did creep,
And chanced to let a fart.
The fart it smelt so strong,
And sounded so much louder
He though that something wrong must be
For he smelt the Lincoln powder.
Hark, Hark says he yet unawake,
How will I show my spunkey?
And reaching down his gun to take
His fingers touched her monkey.
Twas then his courage did appear
He thought he had found a pistol,
He brought his arse up in the air
With his c*** as hard as crystal.
"Swab", he cried, "Swab out the gun,
And give old Lincoln thunder -
Oh, now my boys we'll have some fun
And show him his great blunder."
His c*** into his monkey went
His arse it went to bobbing -
He let a fart and then it spent -
Says Jeffrey's wife, "I'm co-co-coming."
"Fine, fine," cried Jeff, "the gun is clean,"
He strained enough to split -
And throwing his arms around his dear
He strained again and ****.
"Oh, oh," cried Jeff, "I'm shot, I'm shot,
"My leg is bleeding - bleeding.
"Help, help, come here to this spot,
"Oh, death is slowly feeding.
"Oh, would that I were loyal now
"I hear old Abe coming,
"He'll hang me, he will, I vow,
"Yes, yes, I hear him drumming."
"You've ****, you fool," Jeff's wife says
As she held him on a level:
"I never saw such rebel strife
"You nasty stinking devel."
"Oh dear," says Jeff, now wide awake,
"What have I done indeed?
Oh, my wife please take my trembling hand
And we will both secede."
I don't think Walt Whitman would have felt threatened by the wordsmith who came up with that
