I believe President Lincoln was sincere when he addressed people as friends. I don't think the politicians we have today who I have heard use it are sincere. They just want your vote.
"My friends," is indeed a very common phrase in the early to mid 19th century typically used by politicians, lawyers, entertainers, and salesmen, anyone who was addressing an audience. It's also seen a lot in temperance, abolition, and women's rights speeches -- though again, they're typically addressing large audiences.
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