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So many anti-Grant adjectives and spin in one post.

Grant initially thought Meade could handle it, since Meade and Lee were the two army commanders. Lee refused. Within a half hour of hearing of Lees refusal to work it with Meade, Grant sent Lee a dispatch requesting:

General R. E. LEE​
COLD HARBOR, VA.​
June 5,1864.​
Commanding the Confederate Army:​
It is reported to me that there are wounded men, probably of both armies, now lying exposed and suffering between the lines occupied respectively by the two armies. Humanity would dictate that some provision should be made to provide against such hardships. I would propose, therefore, that hereafter when no battle is raging either party be authorized to send to any point between the pickets men bearing litters to pick up their dead or wounded without being fired upon by the other party. Any other method equally fair to both parties you may propose for meeting the end desired, will be accepted by me.​
U. S. GRANT,​
Lieutenant-General.​

Lee responds the same evening:

HEADQUARTERS ARMY OF NORTHERN VIRGINIA,​
Lieut. Gen. U. S. GRANT​
June 5, 1864.​
Commanding U. S. Armies:​
GENERAL: I have the honor to acknowledge the receipt of your letter of this date proposing that hereafter, except in time of action, either party be at liberty to remove the dead and wounded from between the lines. I fear that such an arrangement will lead to misunderstanding and difficulty. I propose, therefore, instead, that when either party desires to remove their dead or wounded, a flag of truce be sent, as is customary. It will always afford me pleasure to comply with such a request as far as circumstances will permit.​
Very respectfully, your obedient servant,​
R. E. LEE,​
General.​


Grant doesn't get the reply until the next morning (June 6) and replies to Lee:
June 6,1864.​
General R. E. LEE,​
Commanding Army of Northern Virginia:​
Your communication of yesterday’s date is received. I will send immediately, as you propose, to collect the dead and wounded between the lines of the two armies, and will also instruct that you be allowed to do the same. I propose that the time for doing this be between the hours of 12 p.m. and 3 p.m. today. I will direct all parties going out to bear a white flag, and not to attempt to go beyond where we have dead or wounded, and not beyond or on ground occupied by your troops.​
U. S. GRANT,​
Lieutenant General​

Lee replies:
HEADQUARTERS ARMY OF NORTHERN VIRGINIA,​
Lieut. Gen. U. S. GRANT​
June 6, 1864.​
Commanding U. S. Army:​
GENERAL: I have the honor to acknowledge the receipt of your letter, on this date and regret to find that I did not make myself understood in my communication of yesterday. I intended to say that I could not consent to the burial of the dead and the removal of the wounded between the armies in the way you propose, but that when either party desire such permission it shall be asked for by flag of truce in the usual way.​
Until I receive a proposition from you on the subject to which I can accede with propriety, I have directed any parties you may send under white flags as mentioned in your letter to be turned back.​
Very respectfully, your obedient servant,​
R. E. LEE,​
General.​

So Grant replies once again, on the 6th, in the way that Lee wants:

June 6, 1864.​
General R. E. LEE,​
Commanding Army of Northern Virginia:​
The knowledge that wounded men are now suffering from want of attention, between the two armies, compels me to ask a suspension of hostilities for sufficient time to collect them in, say two hours. Permit me to say that the hours you may fix upon for this will be agreeable to me, and the same privilege will be extended to such parties as you may wish to send out on the same duty, without further application.​
U. S. GRANT,​
Lieutenant-General.​

But Lee doesn't reply until the evening, saying that Grant's dispatch did not arrive in time:
HEADQUARTERS ARMY OF NORTHERN VIRGINIA​
June, 6. 1864.​
Lieut. Gen. U. S. GRANT,​
Commanding U.S. Armies:​
GENERAL: I regret that your letter of this date asking a suspension of hostilities to enable you to remove your wounded from between the two armies was received at so late an hour as to make it impossible to give the necessary directions so as to enable you to effect your purpose by daylight.​
In order that the suffering of the wounded may not be further protracted, I have ordered that any parties you may send out for the purpose between the hours of 8 and 10 p.m. to-day shall not be molested, and will avail myself of the privilege extended to those from this army to collect any of its wounded that may remain upon the field.​
I will direct our skirmishers to be drawn close to our lines between the hours indicated, with the understanding that at the expiration of the time they be allowed to resume their positions without molestation, and that during the interval all military movements be suspended.​
Very respectfully, your obedient servant,​
R. E. LEE,​
General.​

So Grant is OBVIOUSLY trying to conduct the ceasefire in the terms Lee wanted, but the communications are taking too long. Grant replies the next morning, June 7, and notes that Lee's dispatch arrived "after the hour" Lee proposed, and that CONFEDERATE stretcher bearers were captured between the lines:

June 7, 1864-10.30 a. m.​
General R. E. LEE,​
Commanding Army of Northern Virginia:​
I regret that your note of 7 p.m. yesterday should have been received at the nearest corps headquarters to where it was delivered after the hour that had been given for the removal of the dead and wounded had expired. 10.45 p.m. was the hour at which it was received at corps headquarters, and between 11 and 12 it reached my headquarters. As a consequence, it was not understood by the troops of this army that there was a cessation of hostilities for the purpose of collecting the dead and wounded and none were collected. Two officers and six men of the Eighth and Twenty-fifth North Carolina Regiments, who were out in search of the bodies of officers of their respective regiments, were captured and brought into our lines owing to this want of understanding. I regret this, but will state that as soon as I learned the fact I directed that they should not be held as prisoners, but must be returned to their commands. These officers and men having been carelessly brought through our lines to the rear, I have not determined whether they will be sent back the way they came or whether they will be sent by some other route.​
Regretting that all my efforts for alleviating the sufferings of wounded men left upon the battle-field have been rendered nugatory,​
I remain &c.,​
U. S. GRANT,​
Lieutenant-General.​

So now Lee replies yet again, in this miscommunication farce:

HEADQUARTERS ARMY OF NORTHERN VIRGINIA​
June 7, 1864--2p.m.​
Lieut. Gen. U. S. GRANT,​
Commanding U.S. Armies:​
GENERAL: Your note of 10:30 a.m. to-day has just been received. I regret that in my letter to you of 7 p. m. yesterday should have been too late in reaching you to effect the removal of the wounded.​
I am willing, if you desire it, to devote the hours between 6 and 8 this afternoon to accomplish that object upon the same terms and conditions as set forth in my letter of 7 p. m. yesterday. If this will answer your purpose, and you will send parties from your lines at the hour designated with white flags I will direct that they be recognized and be permitted to collect the dead and wounded.​
I will also notify the officers on my lines that they will be permitted to collect any of our men that may be on the field. I request you will notify me as soon as practicable if this arrangement is agreeable to you. Lieutenant McAllister, Corporal Martin, and two privates of the Eighth North Carolina Regiment, and Lieutenant Hartman, Corporal T. Kinlow, and Privates Bass and Grey were sent last night, between the hours of 8 and 10 p.m., for the purpose of recovering the body of Colonel Murchison, and as they have not returned, I presume they are the men mentioned in your letter. I request that they be returned to our lines.​
Very respectfully, your obedient servant,​
R. E. LEE,​
General.​

And yet again, the dispatch arrives late, but Grant hopes to get the stretcher bearers out. He also tells Lee that the captured CONFEDERATE stretcher bearers will be returned. Grant:

June, 7, 1864-5.30 p. m.​
General R. E. LEE,​
Commanding Army of Northern Virginia:​
Your note of this date just received. It will be impossible for me to communicate the fact of the truce by the hour named by you (6 p. m.), but I will avail myself of your offer at the earliest possible moment, which I hope will not be much after that hour. The officers and men taken last evening are the same mentioned in your note and will be returned.​
U. S. GRANT,​
Lieutenant-General.​

So Grant had given Lee the terms he wanted on the 6th, and it wasn't until the evening of the 7th that Grant could send out a recovery. Grant was legitimately frustrated by the ridiculous nitpicking and miscommunications. The Grant haters try to make something out of this incident, but it's clear that Lee shares responsibility for the miscommunications and delays.
The plight of wounded federals dying in the sun was the responsibility of their commanders not that of Lee. It was up to the Federal commanders to get their act together forthwith and indicate to Lee who was in charge of their army and that all hostilities would cease while the wounded were removed from the field.
 
The plight of wounded federals dying in the sun was the responsibility of their commanders not that of Lee. It was up to the Federal commanders to get their act together forthwith and indicate to Lee who was in charge of their army and that all hostilities would cease while the wounded were removed from the field.
Grant gave Meade permission to ask Lee for a truce. Lee refused to deal with Meade. Apparently Lee wanted to nitpick about protocol, rather than allow the wounded to be recovered.
 
I don’t hate dead people. Figured I would say that I have no axe to grind when it comes to history before I venture an opinion. :D

In this instance Grant did not want to admit defeat. Once it is established that Meade asking for a truce is not acceptable for whatever reasons of protocol, Grant needs to do so. His June 5 letter is vague (what does “...when no battle is raging” mean?) and Lee is right to point that out. No one wants stretcher-bearers shot.
On June 6, Grant first specifies a time without requesting a suspension of hostilities and then requests a suspension without a specific time. Had he combined both in a single clear request, even without adding the phrase “under a flag of truce” then I might put the onus on Lee for further delay. Factor in the impossibility of direct instantaneous contact and we get tragedy.

While fully aware that pride is at work all around, I have to call this one for Lee.
 
I don’t hate dead people. Figured I would say that I have no axe to grind when it comes to history before I venture an opinion. :D

In this instance Grant did not want to admit defeat. Once it is established that Meade asking for a truce is not acceptable for whatever reasons of protocol, Grant needs to do so. His June 5 letter is vague (what does “...when no battle is raging” mean?) and Lee is right to point that out. No one wants stretcher-bearers shot.
On June 6, Grant first specifies a time without requesting a suspension of hostilities and then requests a suspension without a specific time. Had he combined both in a single clear request, even without adding the phrase “under a flag of truce” then I might put the onus on Lee for further delay. Factor in the impossibility of direct instantaneous contact and we get tragedy.

While fully aware that pride is at work all around, I have to call this one for Lee.
I agree the first message could have been clearer. But Grant's second message proposed a time, and acknowledged that the Union stretcher bearers would be carrying white flags. I think that should have been enough for Lee.

So I blame Lee just as much as Grant.
 
Grant gave Meade permission to ask Lee for a truce. Lee refused to deal with Meade. Apparently Lee wanted to nitpick about protocol, rather than allow the wounded to be recovered.
Then why didn't Grant step forward immediately and deal with Lee? Sounds to me it was the Yankee whoever in command that nitpicked.
 
Then why didn't Grant step forward immediately and deal with Lee? Sounds to me it was the Yankee whoever in command that nitpicked.
He did step forward. As I said earlier, within a half-hour of learning Lee wouldn't deal with Meade, Grant sent out the first message to Lee. It was early afternoon on June 5th.
 
Imagine that.

Grant lines them up in a Suicide mission. Don’t want to admit a Defeat. Let’s his men perish in the field. All trying to get a good Newspaper Headline for Candidate Lincoln.
Well Lee certainly didn't care how many wounded Americans were dying. That's obvious.
 
At Cold Harbor, Grant ignored the military protocol that he had already been taught. A week after the battle in the Wilderness, a flag had been sent in Meade’s name for the removal of some four hundred wounded still held there by the rebels. The enemy refused, requiring “that a flag of truce be sent by order of Lieutenant-General Grant before their delivery can be effected.” Grant complied, requesting the transfer in his name from the “Headquarters Armies of the United States,” although he avoided using the phrase “flag of truce.” This was again rejected, not being addressed to General Lee.

For two days after the June 3rd assault, Grant had done nothing to bring in the wounded.

Meade did not contact Lee or get rebuffed by him at Cold Harbor. Meade brought the issue up to Grant, and Grant, instead of doing it immediately in his own name, gave it back to Meade.

When Grant finally agreed to contact Lee, he mentioned nothing about a flag of truce or a suspension of hostilities. He tried to equate the wounded of the two sides, instead of recognizing that the great majority were Union.

Lee responded that he would gladly comply with a request under the customary "flag of truce."

Although Grant had already assured Lee that, "Any other method equally fair to both parties you may propose for meeting the end desired, will be accepted by me," he now ignored Lee's proposal for a flag of truce and, instead, suggested litter-bearers bearing white flags.

Only when Grant found that he could not get around the well-known protocol for requesting a suspension of hostilities under a flag of truce did he give in.

Grant was wrong time after time after time after time (1) Not requesting a cease-fire soon after the June 3rd assault; (2) Sending the issue back to Meade when he knew better; (3) The first proposal without mention of any flag of truce or cease-fire; and (4) the second proposal merely mentioning litter-bearers bearing white flags).
 
And it occurred to me that it couldn’t be through Meade because the XVIII Corps was technically Army of the James.
From the Papers of US Grant, volume 11, page 18:

On June 5, 1:00 p.m., Maj. Gen. Winfield S. Hancock had written to Brig. Gen. Seth Williams asking that arrangements be made to move wounded men who had remained in front of the lines since June 3. O.R., I, xxxvi, part 3, 603.​
Maj. Gen. George G. Meade endorsed this letter. "Respectfully referred to Lieutenant-General Grant. Is it possible to ask, under flag of truce, for permission to remove the wounded now lying between our lines, and which the enemy's sharpshooters prevent me bringing off? The wounded are lying in front of the Second, Sixth, and Eighteenth Corps." Ibid., p. 604.​
USG also endorsed this letter. "A flag might be sent proposing to suspend firing where the wounded are, until each party get their own. I have no objection to such a course." Ibid.​
At 1:30 p.m., Meade wrote to USG. "Any communication by flag of truce will have to come from you, as the enemy do not recognize me as in command whilst you are present." ALS, DNA, RG 108, Letters Received. O.R., I, xxxvi, part 3, 599.​
 
At Cold Harbor, Grant ignored the military protocol that he had already been taught. A week after the battle in the Wilderness, a flag had been sent in Meade’s name for the removal of some four hundred wounded still held there by the rebels. The enemy refused, requiring “that a flag of truce be sent by order of Lieutenant-General Grant before their delivery can be effected.” Grant complied, requesting the transfer in his name from the “Headquarters Armies of the United States,” although he avoided using the phrase “flag of truce.” This was again rejected, not being addressed to General Lee.

For two days after the June 3rd assault, Grant had done nothing to bring in the wounded.

Meade did not contact Lee or get rebuffed by him at Cold Harbor. Meade brought the issue up to Grant, and Grant, instead of doing it immediately in his own name, gave it back to Meade.

When Grant finally agreed to contact Lee, he mentioned nothing about a flag of truce or a suspension of hostilities. He tried to equate the wounded of the two sides, instead of recognizing that the great majority were Union.

Lee responded that he would gladly comply with a request under the customary "flag of truce."

Although Grant had already assured Lee that, "Any other method equally fair to both parties you may propose for meeting the end desired, will be accepted by me," he now ignored Lee's proposal for a flag of truce and, instead, suggested litter-bearers bearing white flags.

Only when Grant found that he could not get around the well-known protocol for requesting a suspension of hostilities under a flag of truce did he give in.

Grant was wrong time after time after time after time (1) Not requesting a cease-fire soon after the June 3rd assault; (2) Sending the issue back to Meade when he knew better; (3) The first proposal without mention of any flag of truce or cease-fire; and (4) the second proposal merely mentioning litter-bearers bearing white flags).
This is wrong. Grant didn't learn about these wounded until mid-day on the 5th.
 
From the Papers of US Grant, volume 11, page 18:

On June 5, 1:00 p.m., Maj. Gen. Winfield S. Hancock had written to Brig. Gen. Seth Williams asking that arrangements be made to move wounded men who had remained in front of the lines since June 3. O.R., I, xxxvi, part 3, 603.​
Maj. Gen. George G. Meade endorsed this letter. "Respectfully referred to Lieutenant-General Grant. Is it possible to ask, under flag of truce, for permission to remove the wounded now lying between our lines, and which the enemy's sharpshooters prevent me bringing off? The wounded are lying in front of the Second, Sixth, and Eighteenth Corps." Ibid., p. 604.​
USG also endorsed this letter. "A flag might be sent proposing to suspend firing where the wounded are, until each party get their own. I have no objection to such a course." Ibid.​
At 1:30 p.m., Meade wrote to USG. "Any communication by flag of truce will have to come from you, as the enemy do not recognize me as in command whilst you are present." ALS, DNA, RG 108, Letters Received. O.R., I, xxxvi, part 3, 599.​

Right. And thank you for the citations. The XVIII Corps chain of command is not as relevant as I thought.
It still seems to me that on June 5 all is solved after 1:30 PM if Grant sends Lee a clear request. Notice that Meade says “flag of truce” in both communications. Grant means the same thing in his endorsement but doesn’t use the word. Ok I get that; admitting mistakes can be tough. But he had to know that his first letter to Lee didn’t commit to the cease-fire that would be needed over at least a three-corps front.
 
Horace Porter indicated that, on or about the night of June 3rd, "General Grant's time was now given up almost entirely to thinking of the care of the wounded."

Are you saying that Porter had it wrong?
I'm saying these relevant wounded, by the Dispatch road, were not reported to Meade and Grant until mid-day on June 5th.
 
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