Grant A loyal and loving heart - Julia Dent Grant

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Jan 24, 2017
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Today is Julia Dent Grant's Birthday.

She was a loyal wife to her husband, Ulysses S. Grant, and the woman behind the man who attained victory for the Union during the Civil War.

Her reflections of him in the period after he resigned his Commission from the army, and regarding subsequent opions expressed by others, reveal her sense of loyalty.

"I have been both indignant and grieved over the statement of pretended personal acquaintances of Captain Gant at this time to the effect that he was dejected, low-spririted, badly dressed, and even slovenly. Well, I am quite sure they did not know my Captain Grant, for he was always perfection, both in manner and person, a cheerful, self-reliant, earnest gentleman. His beautiful eyes, windows of his great soul; his mouth so tender, yet so firm. One must not deem me partial if I say General Grant was the very nicest and handsomest man I ever saw, and I have seen his great army of one millon men, all brave, all handsome, gallant soldiers. May I confess right here and tell of how my loving heart swelled with pride and gratitude to know that my own beloved General was commander of this grand, victorious army?"

The Personal Memoirs of Julia Dent Grant (Mrs Ulysses S. Grant)
 
I didn't know Julia wrote her memoirs too. I have to read them now after that snippet; it's so sweet and fully shows how much in love she was with her Captain Grant. :smile:

Thanks, Deb!
You're welcome, Lu :smile: I thought it was important to gain Julia's perspective on her husband, and their times. There are many snippets in her memoirs that show both her innocence and her wit, her devotion and even an odd hiccup that would not be unexpected in any couple's relationship. I always like to read what comes from the horses mouth, so to speak. Though it can be considered biased, it is definitely insightful. And Julia's account is delightful in that it allows us her perspective on a man so often pondered, and so often maligned. It is the perspective of one who sees through the eyes of love.
 
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Today is Julia Dent Grant's Birthday.

She was a loyal wife to her husband, Ulysses S. Grant, and the woman behind the man who attained victory for the Union during the Civil War.

Her reflections of him in the period after he resigned his Commission from the army, and regarding subsequent opions expressed by others, reveal her sense of loyalty.

"I have been both indignant and grieved over the statement of pretended personal acquaintances of Captain Gant at this time to the effect that he was dejected, low-spririted, badly dressed, and even slovenly. Well, I am quite sure they did not know my Captain Grant, for he was always perfection, both in manner and person, a cheerful, self-reliant, earnest gentleman. His beautiful eyes, windows of his great soul; his mouth so tender, yet so firm. One must not deem me partial if I say General Grant was the very nicest and handsomest man I ever saw, and I have seen his great army of one millon men, all brave, all handsome, gallant soldiers. May I confess right here and tell of how my loving heart swelled with pride and gratitude to know that my own beloved General was commander of this grand, victorious army?"

The Personal Memoirs of Julia Dent Grant (Mrs Ulysses S. Grant)

What a lovely and loving passage. It gives a real sense of how she saw him. I imagine her supportive attitude must have been a real source of strength for him
 
I believe it was certainly a more happy relationship than that of Sherman and his wife
 
What a lovely and loving passage. It gives a real sense of how she saw him. I imagine her supportive attitude must have been a real source of strength for him
I agree, and I've no doubt Julia was his strength. And he, hers.

I still remember reading about how she thought she should consider an eye operation again after Grant became President, feeling self-conscious about her looks. But, he calmly reassured her that what he wanted was the woman he married, and had fallen in love with.

'Grant’s “Eye” Love You

The decision for eye surgery was Julia’s alone. Grant seldom interfered with her personal choices. But this particular decision unsettled him.

Shortly before the First Lady was about to leave for Philadelphia, she received a short note from him.

Dear Julia,

I don’t want to have your eyes fooled with. They are all right as they are. They look just as they did the very first time I ever saw them – the same eyes I looked into when I fell in love with you – the same eyes that looked up into mine and told me that my love was returned…

Julia unpacked her suitcase and cancelled her appointment.

She never had her eye repaired – or complained about it again'

https://www.blogarama.com/governmen...us-blog/19379851-julia-grants-eyes-love-story
 
I believe it was certainly a more happy relationship than that of Sherman and his wife
That is a shame about Sherman and his marriage, and I really don't know much about it. Having said that, I would prefer to stick with the topic at hand which is Julia Dent Grant.
 
Nice. I do remember reading about how Grant did not think her eyes, and their appearance made any difference in his love for her. And really telling her, and the world that he did not find any fault. What a wonderful man. He understood her insecurity, and he had her back.
 
He understood her insecurity, and he had her back.
This is what I love about the Grant's. They had eachother's back, and it is the greatest testament to any relationship I think.

That's why I wanted to make the focus of this thread about Julia's loyalty to her husband.

It is a great way to celebrate the woman that she was. And without her, I'm not sure Grant could have won the war.
 
This is what I love about the Grant's. They had eachother's back, and it is the greatest testament to any relationship I think.

That's why I wanted to make the focus of this thread about Julia's loyalty to her husband.

It is a great way to celebrate the woman that she was. And without her, I'm not sure Grant could have won the war.
He needed that steady confidence in him that his wife had. She was his steady rock.
 
Thanks for the quote. I've bookmarked the blog and will read more.
:smile: If you follow the link to the original post it leads to a Presidential history blog. I hope to use more insights from this to add to the Grant forum. They do provide sources, which I think is always important.
 
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Julia was a bit of a mystic and a romantic dreamer. She grew up with a gilded spoon in her hand and certainly did not shun the finer things in life when they were available to her. This is not to say that she was not an honest and generous woman. There was certainly a strong sense of love and commitment. She was willing to wait four years of separation for Ulysses, she was willing to leave her home and lifestyle behind for him, she was willing to defy her father and walk away from their political beliefs. I suppose opposites do attract though. Grant was typically mild mannered, unable to manage finances too shrewdly, saw things in black and white, was not overly concerned about his appearance and did not have any intense desire for the finer things in life. Julia had a temper that could be riled, was more shrewd with finances, saw things with rose-colored glasses and loved the finer things in life. They both deep down shared poetic souls which manifested themselves in their affectionate correspondence and mutual love of nature and travel. They were not the perfect parents but they knew that love and mutual respect were the foundations of a healthy family, and their family certainly displayed it. The couples' playful humor and almost sophomoric affection seem to stand out as features of their relationship, helping to keep that spark alive throughout their years together. When Grant chose Julia, he was not looking for physical perfection, their relationship was formed at a deeper level. Their early relationship was one of forced separation therefore forced celibacy giving them a chance to grow to love one another for their minds, hearts and souls devoid of the bonds of physicality. This may be a key to their deep connection, abiding trust and absolute loyalty. They grew so close, Julia could not fathom a world where Ulysses did not exist anymore. It was her friends and family that kept her going those final 17 years without him.

At a memorial service at the Methodist Church in Washington DC upon Julia's death Rev. Frank Bristol would say of her:

"She saw in him [Ulysses], the young lieutenant, power and greatness before anyone else...No man ever owed more to his wife than did Ulysses S. Grant...She helped to lift that genius from oblivion. He knew enough always to appreciate what his wife had done for him."
 
When Grant chose Julia, he was not looking for physical perfection, their relationship was formed at a deeper level. Their early relationship was one of forced separation therefore forced celibacy giving them a chance to grow to love one another for their minds, hearts and souls devoid of the bonds of physicality. This may be a key to their deep connection, abiding trust and absolute loyalty. They grew so close, Julia could not fathom a world where Ulysses did not exist anymore. It was her friends and family that kept her going those final 17 years without him.
This is a lovely reflection.
 
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