Ladies, who would you like to be courted by?

[jebstuartgirl]

What Civil War soldier would you like to be courted by?

No secret here, but I would have to say the dashing J.E.B. Stuart. He describes in his personal letters to Bettie Hairston, "the blackberry hunt, the walk over to the spring, exploits on the water gap, frequent excursions in the garden, and the harvesters' serenade". A true romantic with a soft spot for music and song. A handsome cavalier with a sense of humor and a love of life. What a guy! Flora Stuart was a very lucky woman indeed.

[ami]

what a fantastic question! I really don't know, I think I would pick Stonewall Jackson, only because, I love the Mort Kunstler painting Julia, in that picture, he looked like a loving, careing, gentle husband and father.

Ami

[blue_zouave]

Well, since Zou's no lady, I guess the question is moot for me!

I might consider an appointment to William S. Rosecrans's staff, however.

Get that danged pedestal out of my sight,
Zou

[rallyround]

I think I should agree with Ami. Stonewall Jackson please!

[redeye]

It goes without saying (and I'm speaking as a lady here, not as a soldier or a horse) that my esteem for General R.B. Garnett is marked by the utmost respectability and discretion for his good name and mine. However, considering the reports of his kind and sensitive personality, his unmarried state, the standing of his family, and last but not least his good looks (at least traditionally reported, if we consider those portraits of a darkly handsome officer as wrongly attributed), well, I would definitely not refuse gentlemanly ouvertures on his part.

Speaking as a more flirtatious modern-times Civil War fan, I'm not indifferent to the charms of Stonewall Jackson either, and also of W.S. Hancock. After watching just a slice of Ken Burns' Civil War I've found myself fancying the young Grant, and even McClellan, go figure...

[longstreetlass]

Sorry to say, I am entirely too covetous (and maybe jealous) to have a famous beau or husband, though among the greats, you know my favorite one.

I would skip courtship and get to the engagement or marriage, even skip over the war part, just to have my beloved man back home with me and living a quiet, simple life.

LongstreetLass

[jebstuartgirl]

To have a beau or husband that had all the ladies swooning would be most flattering, I think. A brave and gallant soldier in battle and a tender and loving soul when home. Your very own knight in shining armor. A man you could look up to, admire, be proud of and love.

The war took so many fine men and a woman was fortunate if her "knight" returned from battle. I can't imagine the strength and fortitude these women had to endure those 4 long years.

I just finished reading JEB's letters to his dear wife, Flora, and as they drew closer to 1864 and the inevitable end I felt knots in my throat. How Flora must have worried throughout the war only to receive the note that she prayed she would never see. I read the last letter with tears in my eyes and immediately flipped back to the front of the book and his days at West Point. Then he would be alive again with a future full of promise. At least you can do that in a book. If only you could do it in life.


Forgive me for rambling on but this is the only place I can come and express my feelings, if only for myself.

~JebGirl~

[samgrant]

Daniel Ruggles was pretty hot, mostly for his resemblance to Santa Claus.

[Miss Markie]

Um. I will have to admit... I don't know who Daniel Ruggles is...although I am acquainted with Santa Claus...

Well, *sigh*, Robert E. Lee is the one for me. The painting of him about the time he was graduated from the point sends Miss Markie into a swoon every time.

And don't get me started on the Gallant Pelham. His photo graces every desk I work from: home, school, and my classroom. He is now a trifle young for Miss Markie. But since this is all just daydreaming, why not subtract a few years from my true age.
(Miss Markie conceals a still girlish blush behind her fan...)

[samgrant]

Um. I will have to admit... I don't know who Daniel Ruggles is...although I am acquainted with Santa Claus...

Well, *sigh*, Robert E. Lee is the one for me. The painting of him about the time he was graduated from the point sends Miss Markie into a swoon every time.

And don't get me started on the Gallant Pelham. His photo graces every desk I work from: home, school, and my classroom. He is now a trifle young for Miss Markie. But since this is all just daydreaming, why not subtract a few years from my true age.
(Miss Markie conceals a still girlish blush behind her fan...)

Pelham? Miss M., how could you not love this mugg?

http://www.generalsandbrevets.com/sgr/ruggles.htm

[ole]

Hardly fair for us guys. Ugly was pandemic among the ladies -- giving us menfolks little to lust after.
Ole

[Ozark Iron John]

I'd encourage you gals to take a good hard look at General John Hunt Morgan. A most dashing cavalier, to say the least.

[william42]

My wife is not a civil war buff by any stretch, but I emailed this painting by Mort Kunstler to her one day, and she fell in love with it, and it's become her all time favorite. Has it as her wallpaper on her computer at work. Not sure who the people are in the painting. It's entitled "Remember Me".

[samgrant]

Looks to me, that must be Miss Markie and the Gallant "Sally" Pelham!

[Highfly]

Bedford Forrest.
I considered RB Garnett, but fell in love with this painting...

[30th_il]

Hardly fair for us guys. Ugly was pandemic among the ladies -- giving us menfolks little to lust after.
Ole

Ole, they ain't that bad if you squint your eyes...(and have a few beers)!

[ole]

Ole, they ain't that bad if you squint your eyes...(and have a few beers)!

Don't know about your tolerance to cold barley soup, 31st, but it would take me approximately 18 in 2 hours to get my eyes adjusted to that degree -- crossed and closed.
Ole

[bama_belle]

Stonewall Jackson, Robert E. Lee or W. S. Hancock

[virginnysweetheart74]

I will have to say my beau would be George Pickett, just because I loved the discription that Michael Shaara gave him in The Killer Angels

[Miss Markie]

Gentlemen!! All this unchivalrous talk about the pandemia of ugliness amongst the fairer sex, why goodness gracious!
If you only knew that much of what women are looking for in a worthy courting male has little to do with looks and much to do with disposition... and courtliness.

And let's not forget manners...and thoughtfulness... and the willingness to do great deeds in her name and defense, if need be.

I can see that Miss Markie had better continue to check on you all. Some of you boys left to your own devices will quite do yourself a mischief if someone doesn't keep you on the straight and narrow path....

[ole]

Certainly glad the unbridled lust police are paying attention. A little equal opportunity here, Miss Markie. You chastise the gentlemen while the ladies, yourself included, pruriently canoodle with bearded knights. The double standard is alive and very well, thank you.
Ole

[Miss Markie]

Dear Ole,
You were not so much being chided as reminded it is not all LOOKS that ladies are interested in.

And I am wondering so why you protest thus? Has some nerve been tweaked? I meant no harm, although I do think it ungallant to refer to all women of the Civil War era as being part of some 'pandemic of ugly' .

Please Ole, do not be wounded so. Or so angry! No slight or any negative comparison was intended. And I would never be one to police someone else's, well, um, I believe I was called the "Lust Police". Goodness, I missed THAT promotion!!

[ole]

Do not concern yourself, Dear Lady. Ole feels compelled to raise his voice occasionally for no particular reason. He understands the attraction of a lady for a gentle man -- however physically unstimulating he might be (personal experience). I also understand the attraction of a man for a fine lady of obvious goodness, in spite of her clock-stopping visage. (My father's aunts fall well within my assessment -- OK one of the four was quite attractive.)

Meanwhile, back at the thread, I notice that most of the ladies' choices include the dashing, notable figures. Who picked Grant? A solid loser in civilian life, but a devoted husband and father. Or Thomas? A rugged strong hunk? I can understand the avoidance of Sherman who provided handsomely for his family while largely keeping himself distant from it.

I didn't say all CW-era women were ugly -- just most. Julia Grant and Varina Davis, given a makeover, may well have appealed to modern standards of desirability. There's not a whole lot you could do to gild Mary Todd Lincoln or Belle Boyd.

Now that would be a project for a computer geek -- take some of those portrait photos and apply a modern touch. Just to test my conclusion. Maybe with a touch-up, they'd be more acceptable to modern standards.

Meanwhile, it remains that the ladies prefer the dashing, dangerous man as a dream beau. The men have been strangely silent.

Ole

[Miss Markie]

I am so glad I didn't offend with the somewhat silly musings we have posted here. Since this is all just that, musings, I guess a bit of shallowness is allowed.

Now as for the choices you mentioned. I think I would have a hard time with Grant's cigar smoking!! Although Miss Markie on occasion will indulge in a small, 'ladylike' cigar, it isn't daily, nor 20 a day! However, that aside, I think Ulys loved his Julia very much and was a good and indulgent husband and father. It was, however, very hard to be married to a hero, as is apparent when you read her memoirs. I was getting so depressed by her constant jealousies and complaining of this or that lady trying to catch her husband's eye, after his reaching heroic military then political status, that I could not finish the book!

George Thomas is getting a new look I think. My husband gave me the latest copy of the Smithsonian in which Thomas is referred to as "The Civil War General Cheated by History". He had a tough row to hoe, being a Virginian loyal to the Union (according to the article, his family cut him off for his 'traitorous' ways and turned his picture to the wall. His wife, southern born I would guess, stuck with him. And yes, he's a pretty good looker!

Interesting that no one picked Sherman!

A lot of these men had very 'plain' looking wives, by today's standards, and it is always important to remember that the standards for feminine beauty change on a whim, whereas the standards for handsome men seem to be unchanging. (Miss Markie here mutters something about 'typical' under her breath, but does not want to get into contention about that! )

Now if I was a techno person, I could whip up on screen a photo of some early pics of both Varina Davis, and Cordelia Harvey (first lady of Wisconsin, widowed when her husband drowned in the Tennessee River after Shiloh, founder of several hospitals) when they were younger. They were quite pretty. But again, as they aged, both women and men in the 19th c. tended to gaining weight ( a sign of middle class prosperity) and in general what we would term today as 'letting themselves go'.

I think the reason some of the fellows mentioned here look so dashing in their CW photos has a lot to do with two things: 1. They were photographed at a time when they were ACTIVE, as in getting a lot of exercise, and 2. They were in UNIFORM. Looking at Grant and Hancock, and even my beloved Robert E. Lee in civies, and after the war, they just don't look so 'dashing'. Put the skinniest, geekiest kid in a uniform and all of a sudden, boom! They look purposeful, if not dashing. I have had several former high school students come back to visit me at school after a stint in basic, and they just look like "hey, how come this kid couldn't get a prom date?"

Anyway, I am glad we are still friends, dashing Ole.

[ole]

Dashing Ole???? Dear one has been gasping for breath for an hour now, and I fear I'm going to have to sedate her.

Interesting that no one picked Sherman!

From his pictures, it's obvious that he didn't care about how he looked. (Turn off?) And I'm afraid participants with the raging libidos know too much about him to select him -- if Sherman had a smidgeon of tenderness in his body, he didn't show it. (Turn off?)

I'm unqualified to judge the attractiveness of a man so I can only speculate why the scruffy Sherman is not an object of desire. (After all, I think Brad Pitt is unattractive.) With that, I'll agree with your statement that the wormen of the day were plain, and let it go at that.

Ole