Civil War Romances

[Karen Lips]

There is a lot of fiction on romances between Yankees and southern girls. But from all that I have read, it seems highly unlikely that such romances would have taken place considering all the hatred both sides felt for each other. Is there any documentation to prove any such romances ever happened.

Thanks, Karen Lips

[ole]

Don't know about documentation, Karen, the there are many, many incidents of "Grandpa married a southern girl."

I'll suspect that it was not usual, but there are pheremones and chemistry always at work wherever young men and young women are in proximity.

There was some hate, but you might note that not every southern lady detested Yankees. Also, consider that Yankees, as a group were detestable, but that one is kinda cute. And he's polite, considerate and loves to play piano duets with me.

Consider also (and here I'm thinking of the Nazi occupation of France) that history is filled with fraternizing. Yankees have brought home southern brides, Spanish brides, French brides, German brides, English brides, Korean brides, and Vietnamese brides.

I figure simple hatred for a group cannot trump a bit of testosterone and estrogen. Chemistry.

Just a thought.

ole

[johan_steele]

Actually, it was far more common than we might think. There was a lot of respect for the soldier. Those who weren't anywhere near the front lines had a lot more negative to say than those who had US forces in their midst. Keep in mind "Southern" did not always mean Confederate, w/ better than 250,000 southerners in the ranks of the US that should be fairly evident. There was a lot of pro US sentiment throughout the south and many of those were young ladies. Add to that the romances that developed between black women and white soldiers, which happened more frequently than some would like anyone to believe. North Georgia, North Alabama, West Virginia, North Arkansas, East Tennessee, New Orleans, Hilton Head Island, Amelia Island. Romances blossomed between local gals and garrison troops at every location where there were garrison troops... has since the beginning of time.

The hatred between southern civilians and the US soldier is greatly exaggerated by the Lost Cause. It was there, but not to the extent some might hope.

The heart has its reasons which reason knows nothing of. Pascal

[M E Wolf]

Dear KarenLips;

This may help.

Southern Historical Society Papers.
Vol. XIX. Richmond, Va. 1891.
Social Life In Richmond During The War.

[From the Cosmopolitan, December, 1891.
BY EDWARD M. ALFRIEND.

[excerpt]
Wounded and sick men and officers were constantly brought into the homes of the people of Richmond to be taken care of, and every home had in it a sick or wounded Confederate soldier. From the association thus brought about many a love affair occurred and many a marriage resulted. I know of several wives and mothers in the South who lost their hearts and won their soldier husbands in this way, so this phase of life during the war near Richmond was prolific of romance.

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Respectfully submitted for consideration,
M. E. Wolf

[101combatvet]

I have read Recollections of A Veteran or Four Years in Dixie by J. Polk Racine. It is the story of Racine's service in the 5th Maryland (USA) he does describe an incounter with a southern girl friend while at Haroers Ferry. At the end of the war the unit occupied Richmond and there he speaks of a soldier/friend that was seeing a ex-rebel girl.

In my own experience hatred in war is not always as permanent as one would be lead too believe.

Originally Posted by Karen Lips

There is a lot of fiction on romances between Yankees and southern girls. But from all that I have read, it seems highly unlikely that such romances would have taken place considering all the hatred both sides felt for each other. Is there any documentation to prove any such romances ever happened.

Thanks, Karen Lips

[Bobbie]

In the book The Women of the Confederacy by Francis B. Simkins and James W. Patton there's a whole chapter about relations of Southern girls with Yankees.

The authors state that although the thought of Northerners' becoming suitors for the hands of Southern girls usually created extreme disgust (p.55), there were numerous exceptions to the rule. Even if some women "were tempted to exchange favors with the more gracious among the Federal officers, they were restrained from doing so by the opinions of other women" (p.56). On the other hand, the authors describe quite a few cases in which a Southern belle reciprocated romantic advances of a Federal soldier, and confer that "the practice of Southern girls falling in love with Northern officers was sufficiently widespread to become one of the conventions of Southern novels" (p.61).