The Ladies TeaStop in and grab a quick cup of tea! All sorts of ladies issues are disscussed here. Both Ladies and Gentlemen are welcome to join in the conversations.
I think A lot has ro with location & region.. How close you are to the nearest town or Dr and others..
Which Contraception may have have been more availible in the bigger cities .. What about off the beaten path Alabama.
For example
Today we think intodays world that most people have cable or 911 service but not so .. Where my relatives live in Alabama have just resently gotten 911 service but still dont have cable .. so the got a Dish...
this has all beeen within the last 5 or 6 years and even know have city water and down have to use the spring out back for their water.. amazing is it..
[quote=Kim M.]
Jenna, I disagree. To lose a child would be one of the hardest things in life to deal with. The more the merrier would not help parents' grief over the loss of a child. You see, if I had been one of those parents during the Civil War, I would have been one of those women who died in childbirth and lost my baby in the process. Even with modern medicine, I came close to losing my son. The fact that I might have been able to have another could not replace the grief for the one lost.
I think you may have taken my comment just a little out of context, but thats what happens when you type something as oppose to hearing what peopel are saying. I did not mean to come off sounding as though the death of a child could be replaced by another. As a mother of one and one on the way, they are my life and I could not even imagin anything A) taking the place of one or B) replacing one with another. My actual point was that, like you said, they were considered "love tokens" the more they had the more love and family they had.
I am glad to hear that your own experience came out wonderfully at the end,for even with today's modern medicines things can go arye, and they do. But it is because we have such a thing as "modern medicine" that we have such stories and miricles to tell, and it is because of medical firsts, brought on by things like the Civil War, that we can continue to move forward and tell such tales.
Hi Jenna, Sorry for taking so long in getting back to you. Yes, I definitely understand what you're saying now. "Love tokens" as written in the letters and diaries from the era were the equivalent of the "love child" of the 1960s. It really didn't have anything to do with how many children they had or how much love anyone had to give. It was a representation of the physical aspect of their love, which is often contrary to what people think of when speaking about "prudish" Victorians.
In any case, the topic has drifted from the original one. Generalizations have been made that Civil War era people did not use contraception. Documentation from the era does not support such a claim. Charles Knowlton's Fruits of Philosophy did reach rural areas as well as urban. Inexpensive methods (I named some of the common methods of the era in an earlier post) were readily available, but they were also less reliable. There is no doubt that poor people had fewer choices. Even in the extreme rural areas there was folk contraceptive medicine before Charles Knowlton. This knowledge did not die out with the Victorian era. So does that mean couples with large families failed to use contraception, or were their contraceptive measures a failure? I rarely believe that such things can be viewed as black and white. If the issue was studied closely I'm sure you'd discover a combination of both. When it comes to the middle and upper classes, the facts speak for themselves. The birth rate dropped dramatically, and they had fewer children than previous generations. Contraception was readily available. Again, this doesn't mean that every couple used contraception, but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know how they got from point A to B.
If I may interject an opinion, I do not believe contraception was as readily used as implied here. Please note this is opinion only.
Contraception was, I believe, Frowned upon, and still somewhat common. Especially with “those people” (fill in any group you wish as those people, just as we do today)
The best analogy I can think of, not a literal one of course, is abortion. Frowned upon, not approved of by most, but still common today.
One does not generally approve of, but accepts perhaps, the practice. I think contraception then was viewed as abortion is now. Something done commonly, but not talked about in polite society and would raise considerable eyebrows.
"Contraception was, I believe, Frowned upon, and still somewhat common. Especially with 'those people' (fill in any group you wish as those people, just as we do today)"
It may have been frowned upon, but women have always had the "don't ask, don't tell" option. I suspect that folk medicine since recorded history has contained some sort of avoidance/remedy advice for women who wanted to limit their production of children.
Of course they did, as in the abortion analagy I made above. Also note the ready availability of Chamomille tea, southing to the stomach, and if you drink enough takes care of unexpected pregnancy. I just dont think it was acceptable, even though it was done. As you said, dont ask dont tell.
Kim, could the other reason for the big families also come from religious up bringing? I have come across so many Catholic families that seem to be huge, and sorry for singling that religion out, but it just seems like they always had such huge families. Maybe that could be a contribution to the large families as opposed to the lack of contriceptions.
As for the abortion issue of the day, the "ladies" at most brothels knew that well I am sure. Other wise you have so many of them having children as well.
War brings out sex. Think about it. Even in today's war, how many more children will be born to A) Afgan and Iraqi women from "Joes" and B) the ones who come on leave. What's the first thing they do? Heck, after being away from loved ones, that has got to be one of the first things on their minds. No offence guys, but you're all pretty easy to read that way!! :-) So that too could account for an increase in the population.
As for my own little one, due date is fast approaching and I can't wait to meet it. Nope don't know what it is, and according to Martin's daughter, it's a little girl Reb. Figures coming from my friend in the South!! Oh well, about 10-15 more days and I'll know. Thanks for the wishes, Kim.
Jenns;
Being catholic FIrst I take no offense and second I can answer that one.,
It is exactally for the stated reason that catholics have large familys. Contraception was always forbiddin to Catholics. Goin straight to hell if ya do it kinda thing. Recently most Catholics ignore that, but I remember in my youth it was still that way (Ok, so I'm old....)
Ray, in mine as well. Being raised a non- and anti-catholic I nevertherless rebelled against the idea that they were going to hell and we were right. Didn't make a great deal of sense at 13 years old, and doesn't make any more sense now.
However, we did believe that cathoilc girls were looser because they could confess and start over on Saturday. Have I given away my age? We only talked about it, Of course, that was speculation!